BYOS Story

A HERO CAN BE ANYONE
Even a man doing something as simple and reassuring as putting a coat around a little boy’s shoulder to let him know that the world hadn’t ended.

Batman

The Dark Night Rises

Be Your Own Superhero

BYOS

Becoming a mother to a little boy has made me more true, more generous and more uncomfortable than I could have ever imagined.  These costumes are not for play, not for fun but they carry an important message.

Even though it may look like like it, these costumes are not just for play, not just for fun but they carry an important message.  The love of a mother is inscrutable; impossible to understand or interpret at times but believe it or not, I know very little about Superhero’s on the big screen, I am not a movie loving Marvel understanding mommy. I am just a mommy who got an idea, saw an opportunity and went after it. During my little man’s early years I avoided all violent, crime, action fighting cartoons etc.. but in a world like today there are some things you can not avoid.  I would rather show  and teach my son behavior that reflects honesty, understanding and integrity  so that when he faces  influences of any kind he has developed his own set of skills and level of confidence to make the right decision. Life is not about controlling every thing around you but learning to control your thoughts, emotions and managing yourself in a well-balanced way. 

These costumes have deepened my sensibility. Some random June day in 2018, I was scrolling on Instagram, where I stumbled on  a video of this couple dressing up in Incredibles Costumes to go attend the new Incredibles Movie that was just released in the theatre. The man of the relationship filmed him and his girlfriend walking through the parking lot into the movie theater and I was inspired,  immediately I went to amazon looking for costumes in my size and little man’s size. Within 5 minutes I had amazon primed my little man and I our own Incredibles costumes.  Little did I know the impact this would have or the direction it would take us in changing our life forever.

 

To Be Continued...

Wild Flower

Growing within the meadows it is  untamable, not afraid to stand out, a symbol of devotion, purity and everlasting prosperity. Rising high amongst all flowers, there is one that is like no other, the one flower within every meadow sitting free, different and gentle, it is growing wild; it’s unintentionally unique.

Ivorie Nicole

Model. Blogger. Mother. Entrepreneur

Be Your Own Superhero

By Ivorie Nicole

This life is going to beat you down, all right.
It’s going to knock you down.There’s a lot of good and there’s a lot of bad.You do not let that bad take you down, do you understand me. Right now people may not listen to you,
and even sometimes when you get a chance to be heard,  people will not listen to you.

That is OK, it doesn’t matter.

You stick to your truth, you honor yourself and you master your emotions.You master your emotions.You’re going to get scared. You’re going to feel bad.You’re going to get down.

But you always get back up. Do you understand me.Do you understand me? You can be scared, that is okay.You can be unsure, but you cannot give it up, you cannot let go of yourself. You need to take care of yourself.
You need to hold yourself. You got it. 

Say I am a Superhero, I am a Superhero.
I am a superhero! You are you are a Superhero, say I am smart,  I am confident I am loved. Say it, I am loved. Life is not always going to be easy but you got a learn how to manage to manage the hard times because when it gets hard it’s going to get hard.
You are a Superhero.

Yes, you are, no matter what anyone says sometimes you’re not gonna feel like a superhero all the time because you’re going to make a mistake.

But it’s not about that, it’s not always about the mistake, it’s not about what you did wrong it’s about how you make it right. It’s how you treat other people when you make a mistake.

You’re not going to be perfect you’re going to make mistakes.Superheroes aren’t perfect but you know it makes a superhero a super. They get back up and try again and they do it better than they did it before. Superheroes always get back up even after they get knocked out.
Someone is always trying to bring them down but they always get back up and so do you.

These photos represent so much strength co-existing with so much sorrow. Maybe, one day, I will share the story behind them but until then, Be Your Own Superhero.

In My Blood

By Ivorie Nicole

Little me looks so much like my son, Hunter but that picture was taken back in the 90’s in a small town in Wisconsin. I still remember the excitement and rush of adrenaline flowing through my tiny veins and the rush of fear when I realized how far from the ground I was when I looked down from that saddle. I felt so strong, so special that I had the chance to sit in such a large majestic creature it made me glow from the inside.

This is where my courage to explore beyond my limitations began. So many things have enabled and encouraged me even when I felt hindered, I never stopped exploring, or pushing my boundaries because even though 

I didn’t have much growing up I always knew I would own horses. As a child, some would say I acted like a spoiled brat even though I definitely wasn’t spoiled, I just knew what I wanted and would find a way to get it. Spoiled and determined are two different things.  I dreamed every day for things and it didn’t matter if it took  a year, 1 hour, or 10 years I always would get it; if I worked hard and truly wanted it. 

Learning to care for horses in a small freezing  little country town really tested my dedication. Handling, feeding and caring for 1200lb+ beasts in Winter’s with blizzards, negative degree weather and snowstorms is quite an experience. It’s hard work, it’s freezing, it’s intimidating and it’s challenging; it will reveal the true inner self, the inner cow girl. Despite my graceful photos with my two beautiful buckskins, I in fact shovel shit. My cowgirl stars are earned and I’m proud to boast. 

I had chronic asthma and allergies as a child. I had inhalers everywhere; school, the car, my pocket, every family members house, anywhere I was, there was always an inhaler within arms reach. My asthma was so bad that I had a breathing machine at home and for a period of time I was on steroids to prevent my airways from closing. My asthma made a lot of things difficult but I was going to find a way to beat asthma one way or another because nothing was going to stop me from riding. 

The barn in Winter would get so bad I would have to wear air filtered masks to try to protect my lungs from the dirt, mold, dander or any other things trapped inside the barn that was trying to kill me.  As a little girl, I would always minimize my pain believing that I could overcome anything and would look for solutions instead of the problem.I felt victimized by my asthma,  I would look at my sister confused “why can she breathe and I can’t, there’s nothing wrong with my body, everyone has to breathe, my body can’t not want me to breathe, and she sucks at riding horses so lord, just let me breathe” there was nothing I despised more than being told I was incapable of doing something. Like who are you to tell me who I am and what I am capable of?  

Riding horses only fueled this desire to prove myself. The first time I sat on a horse I was younger than 5 years old, the second time I sat on a horse I was was 12 years old. This time it was my turn, I hold the reins. 

I’ll never forget what my trainer told me when I was tacking up one cold Winter afternoon. Horses have taught me so much about myself, so much about life. Horses are a symbol of freedom, an emblem of power, a reflection of  spirit, it’s true the power of a horse is in my blood. It always has been, it always will be; what she said has shaped everything about who I am.

My trainer looked at me, very clearly she told my petite 12 year old self “ If you’re afraid, you’ll never be able to ride. He can sense you, if he knows you’re afraid, he won’t trust you to ride him or for to guide him and if he doesn’t trust you, you will never be able to ride.” 

She scared me, because I realized this riding thing was 100% up to me.

Thoughts of doubt ran threw my mind hard as I wheezed through my breathing mask. “Do I want to even ride, is this right for me? Should I risk my own safety? Am I even strong enough for this? Am I showing I’m not strong enough because I can’t breathe? Is it even worth it to put myself into a position like this?”

Yes, yes it was, it’s in blood. I got on that horse every chance I got. When I had to ride a different horse I felt like I was betraying his trust and inhibiting my growth. I wanted to perfect myself through him, through General, the largest and darkest thoroughbred on the ranch. Day by day, I learned how to manage my fear and use it to be better. 

Riding taught me how to understand and channel my fear. Riding taught me to communicate my fear in silence while working on building trust and setting things up for the future on small consistent act of trust at a time. 

I learned forgiveness through praying my horse will still accept me after I did something wrong during riding. This taught me a valuable lesson that I can make a mistake and be forgiven. I learned forgiveness for myself and for him through finding the patience, understanding and tolerance. 

Riding has shown me what love is.

Jack (R) & Annie (L)

Pliable

By Ivorie Nicole

I know we’ve all heard it before, the famous line that subliminally justifies poor decisions made by adults. Sorry if I am the one to break it you. But, the whole “children are resilient” is just another excuse that enables society to accept less than our capable potential. We live in a world that can be so backwards and unforgiving at times, where it is failing so many families and destroying the substance within our culture. The vulnerable need someone to hear them. The vulnerable need someone to speak for them until they’re strong enough to speak for themselves.

Unfortunately most people in society try to take away the voices children have. We manipulate their biological needs as early as infancy to fit our adult schedules, we limit them to a tiny and unhealthy processed kids menu filled with cheese and wheat and all things non living, we constantly tell them what to do & how to do it. Guidance is great and needed at every phase in life since we are never done growing & can never survive alone in this world but our kids voices and lives need to be protected better, more consciously. This can only be achieved by the care takers being and living more consciously.

Experiences as a child will leave a tremendous impression on the psyche of an adult, it doesn’t matter if the experience is positive or negative. Everything from the smell of breakfast, to the first and last day of almost anything new as a child will last a lifetime but over an entire life span our perspectives of those moments will change as we grow and change too. Some psychologists even claim subconsciously the memory of our birth is stored within us and that it is possible to remember your birth and the feelings your mother felt during your time in the utero.

The first seven years of a child’s life are the most impressionable, the most important as the developing mind in shaping all our memory, problems, joy, fears, sadness, and even the way we trust. Every personal engagement strikes an emotional response that will chisel one’s understanding, whether positive or negative to what life means to that little developing mind; its so personal, so unique just like a fingerprint, there will be no other mind alike.

The ACE’s study has measured that nearly two-thirds of the adult population has at least one Adverse Childhood Experience which is 64% of the population. This means that 64% of adults have had something traumatic occur in their life. We see a doctor for a physical yearly, we see an optometrist to ensure our eyes are seeing clearly, we see a dentists to make sure our teeth are healthy. But for some reason it is not normal for someone to seek mental health care even though statistically 80% of individuals who seek therapy have  benefited  from it.

The ACE study is just the beginning in bridging the gap between ancient healing and conventional science. The ACE study has revealed that the higher your ACE score, the higher you are at risk in enduring difficulties later in life. Things such as mental illness, chronic disease, violent relationships, instability in the workplace, divorce etc.. All things from bronchitis to arthritis and divorce to multiple sclerosis, lack of confidence to a shorter life expectancy is linked to adverse childhood experiences.

Children are not as resilient as we think. It’s time to break the cycle, a child’s resilience is unconditional love; children are not resilient, children love unconditionally and won’t ever stop until they stop loving themselves.

Peace on earth begins at birth. Peace in society starts with the family. Food is medicine. Your mind & body are natural healing vessels that want to love & honor itself and others. The power to heal hurt is by talking about the shit no one talks about. Anything is possible if it aligns with your destiny. You can go through hell and come out an angel.
You can experience adversity and break the cycle.

Before the children of today turn into adults of tomorrow it is everyone’s obligation to make sure our inner child is healing in it’s own lane away from where the children are traveling while simultaneously embracing the freedom, care-free, curious unconditional love a child is. 

 

With love, Miss Ivorie